nothingnessAs a child, I often entertained thoughts that may have not been a normal part of fun and exploration that a little boy might gravitate toward.  Oh yes I had those basic thoughts but at times I would go into almost a loop of thinking which quite often I could not find a solution to.
One of those thoughts had to do with my very existence.
What if the outcome of existence had been different and I had never been born, never even had the chance to live spiritually, never even had any form or entity to call “me” or for that matter never had a thought ever.  How would I perceive the world around me?  What a silly question which could only send a little boy spinning in circles trying to find the root of existence, the beginning of who he was or the possibility of never having been or the possibility of once being but then becoming nothing.
My limited mind was so calculable in the concept of “If things were made, they can be destroyed as well…  If they are they can also become nothing”
There were many other mind twisting thoughts that often visited me but this one seemed a serious nature that could have great consequences on my future.  So I visited and revisited such a thought year after year hoping that my wisdom would osmotically grow until one year I would have a simple answer but alas it never did happen.  I never could resolve on my own the nagging question which had become an old friend.
One day I had an experience so overwhelming and not of a normal mortal interaction but instead a very sacred and spiritual event that since has changed my entire life.  In the midst of placing the gauntlet down and asking If God actually existed I did in fact receive one of the most powerful answers I believe anyone could ever receive.  Once the first experience occurred and my heart and mind were given assurances of the existence of a supreme entity which possessed the ultimate love and power, I ever so innocently and yet with extreme excitement present before my spiritual and mortal creator this old friend of a question and I knew the answer would not be withheld from me.
I simply asked:  “Was there ever a time when I was not?  Ever a time when I did not exist? and will there ever be a time or at least a possibility I could cease to exist?
I had already received the amazing answer that there is a creator and that he was full of love and cared deeply about me so to this question I thought it a rather simple request.  little did I know that when you are connecting to the creator of this entire Universe and beyond, he is merciful and understands the time frame of teaching and learning and does not always have the same agenda as we do.  You see this was not the only question I was presenting to him for I had 5 serious questions I so truly knew I could receive an answer to yet I was unaware how the answers would come…  I had felt that at that very moment they would all be poured out upon me but I was not God and I did not understand his ways and how gentle he teaches.  I have since learned that when real answers come, each one is significantly important enough to allow the atmosphere and timing to be just right before the replies come.
My answer to this question however was given in a timely manner.  This answer immediately began to unfold and yet had not reached it’s maturity to a full answer for a few days.  The room was still filled with the most amazing energy and thus the answer began in such a way as to be explicitly clear in nature but seemingly full of so many details that I felt it not all coming at once.  I did feel it would be given in it’s fullest but that I would receive enough at that moment to calm my soul even more than it already was.  There was so much kindness and love as this energy from beyond me continued to envelope me and enlighten me.
The beginning of this answer was sweet and so assuring and given with so much love that any denial of the message was not even a thought.
“You are light…  You are thought and reason…  You are that you are.  You are independent in your own and you have always been…  You have always been…  You have always been…  For you are eternal, never made nor can you be destroyed.  If there were a beginning, you were there.  You were taken as it were, invited into my light.  You were loved always and always will be.  You are from beginning to end and there is no beginning nor end.  You are mine and I am yours.  You are the most precious treasure this existence holds for you are existence and without you or any like unto you there would be no existence for existence is more than just material.  Without you and your light, your thinking, your reasoning and all others like you, the things of this Universe would not be or be known and existence would cease to be and existence cannot cease to be.”
“You are and always have been my precious son and you step forward one moment at a time until you receive all things, all light and all that I have to give.  There is no “Nothing” nor will there ever be as it is not the foundation of existence.  It’s very thought is not of light but it is a thought of darkness for it lacks truth and therefore it is not.”
So sweet was this assuring connection that I will never be able to fully describe or explain it.  It was and it is so familiar and so full of love.
I had received an answer to a life long question and unexpectedly was the answer and yet so familiar as though I had always know it and had only forgotten it.
In time I received in such amazing ways of communication, the answer to the rest of my questions and those answers are all here in these pages.
© A Book Of Dreams LLC.

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